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Monday, December 8, 2014

The Lords Of Salem by Rob Zombie [2 stars]


From the Description:


Heidi Hawthorne is a thirty-seven-year-old FM radio DJ and a recovering drug addict. Struggling with her new found sobriety and creeping depression, Heidi suddenly receives an anonymous gift at the station-a mysteriously shaped wooden box branded with a strange symbol. Inside the box is a promotional record for a band that identifies themselves only as The Lords. There is no other information.

She decides to play it on the radio show as a joke, and the moment she does, horrible things begin to happen. The strange music awakens something evil in the town. Soon enough, terrifying murders begin to happen all around Heidi. Who are The Lords? What do they want?

As old bloodlines are awakened and the bodies start to pile up, only one thing seems certain: all hell is about to break loose.

Let me start by saying that I love Rob Zombie, his music and most of his movies are great. I really wanted to like this book, unfortunately I didn't. I can't really put my finger on why, the writing was well done, the subject appropriately Halloweeny but it just fell short. When I was around a quarter of the way through I felt like it was NEVER going to end. An unfortunate 2 stars. I want my time back!